"TIMES A WASTIN"

I'm marking today down on the "good day" list.  Not because anything has miraculously changed today, but rather as a choice.  It WAS a nice quieter day, no appts., just time at the house w/ my family all working on our own things.  Ending the day with a delicious homemade lasagna by our dear Joanne Panzetta.   Thanks!!

Made some appts. for next week for Pet/CT and Echocardiogram.  Not looking forward to the tests themselves, but very much looking forward to getting to see my workmates, techs and students, at Lake Medical Imaging in the Villages.  This was one of my clinical sites that I had been working at for the last year, a great place with great people that I miss, including Paul the "B.E. KING".  I was disappointed that I was so close to getting my barium enema comp before my schooling had to be put on hold.   I'm sure for the average person reading this,  "comping" a barium enema procedure on a patient doesn't sound like anything to be getting excited over...but you'd just have to be a first year rad tech student to understand the humorous accomplishment rush of checking that one off your comp list and moving on.  Some of you are smiling!

Dissecting a cat in A&P II

Regarding school, many have asked about my plans in light of the current setback.  After battling over the decision the first weeks after diagnosis and even attending the first two classes back at school this Fall, I finally accepted that it would be the greater good for my health AND my education quality for me to take a medical leave of absence from my program and rejoin as a senior next August.  I so wanted to graduate with my classmates in May, 2012.  This was one of the most crushing aspects of this whole mess to me at first because I'd felt like I'd worked SO hard at school for the last two years or more and didn't want to interrupt my mojo and the goals I had set for myself.  Don't forget, I'm 44, "times a wastin".  I know, I know, just kidding.  But really, I'm now at peace with the delay and have to thank my school directors and friends for going out of their way to work with me in any way possible to make things work.  It was a huge blessing and encouragement.

I think we've about figured out the technical issue w/ some people's comments.  More to come!  I've enjoyed the appreciative comments.  Thanks for taking the time.

ONE MORE SURGERY

Dr. Charles Cox, Surgical Oncologist

TODAY was a long day in Tampa seeing my general surgeon going over path results, eating at Denny's, then seeing an oncologist for the first time and all that goes with that.  Getting right to the point...I will be going back in for a follow-up surgery Monday 10/10 for an axillary disection.  Since there was some cancerous activity in two of the lymph nodes they removed at first surgery (even though it was very small), my general surgeon feels it prudent to go to the next step and remove all breast nodes under the arm just to make sure.  He tells me there's a 80% chance the axillaries will be clear, but this is the only way to know.  But here's the positve note of the day...he will drain that excess fluid buildup while he's in there saving the plastic surgeon his surgery!  Hey, you take it where you can get it, right?

Loved the oncologist we saw after lunch.  He was a kind, gentle and compassionate spirit.  The whole "cancer center" environment was quite emotionally overwhelming for both of us, but we held it together and got the job done.  What a wonderful husband I have!  Everyone's telling us that its all in the attitude, and the ones that survive and do much better are the ones with the positive outlook.  You have moments where you question whether you'll be able to be that person on an ongoing basis, like today when the blood pressure cuff hurt my sore arm so badly I wanted to cry.  Makes me wonder?!?  But faith is the substance of things not seen, right?

As far as treatment plan, several weeks after this next surgery, Pet/CT, Echocardiogram, then 6 mos. of chemo (8 rounds given once every three weeks, shots, bloodwork and implant fillings in between).  Our oncologist was very positive and encouraging and we know we'll get through like every other hairless warrior leaving the clinic today with a smile.  Tired and headed for a shower.

MY FIRST BLOG DAY

Ok, decided to try my hand at blogging.  Hoping this will be both informative to the many kind family and friends who've reached out and might like to keep in touch without worrying about intruding, AND a therapeutic avenue for me to journal the ups and down of this journey I'm now on.  Even better, if I can help someone else in their new fight, then its worth it.

First let me say how wonderful everyone in my life has been, starting with my faithful husband, my sweet sons who all cater to my every need.  Then to my sister, right there everyday to check on me, and the many other friends, classmates and family who call, send cards, emails, texts and food.  I've never felt so loved!

AS A CATCH UP: 
It's been about two weeks from my surgery, bi-lat mastectomy, 7 lymph nodes removed to test and w/ immediate reconstruction begun by the placement of tissue expanders (a/k/a ROCKS) in my now otherwise 6th grade chest.  For those who don't know, the process is that I will go every couple of weeks over 3 or 4 mos. to have gradual saline infillings into these expanders which are placed behind the pectoral muscles in the chest wall.  The gradual fillings allow the muscle and skin to stretch slowly until permanent prosthesis (a/k/a fake boobs) can be switched out for the expanders.  How do I feel?  Relatively speaking, I'm good, some days better than others so far.  I know it could be much worse and God and pain pills have helped.  Truthfully, it feels like a truck is sitting on my chest.  I can't put my arms down because my underarms, side chests and upper arms sting and burn all the time and stay swollen out.  Some of discomfort is from the lymph node removal.  I can't reach high or move very easily.  But with all that said....I desire to be positive and God has dried my tears many times already when I began to feel sorry for myself.  Here's a positive note...I've lost about 6 lbs. since surgery, yes!  

Last two days I've been feeling rougher.  First week follow-up visits seem to go well and got the irritating drains taken out, but since then, swelling has increased and taken my previous discomfort level  to a new level.  Evenings have been the hardest, and forced to sleep on my back, an irritating nerve "thing" has started down my left thigh.  As far as the swelling, if my body doesn't absorb the excess fluid on its own in the next few days, plastic surgeon will want to take me back to surgery and insert a new drain.  If any sign of infection is present, he'll want to take out the tissue expanders and basically start back to square one after three months.  Not the news my husband and I wanted to hear, but....we pray... and we keep going.

Tomorrow's a busy day in Tampa.  We see my general surgeon in the morning and get complete pathology reports and also see my oncologist for the first time after lunch.  More to come and thanks for the prayers.