"YORK PEPPERMINT HEAD"

THIS PAST WEEK was my 3rd and "good" week, and I DID feel much better and tried to make the best of it.  Monday I attended a free event in Eustis for cancer patients put on by the American Cancer Society called "Look Good Feel Better" which is an intimate workshop setting where you learn from volunteers about skin care during chemo, applying makeup and fake eyebrows, how to tie scarves, etc.  It was nice, not as good as I imagined, but I did walk away with tons of makeup samples from different cosmetic companies which was great and met two very sweet older ladies going through similar struggles with cancer.  Tuesday afternoon was Christmas goody-making with Sami into the evening, choir practice for the Christmas cantata on Thursday night, Christmas shopping on Saturday, etc.

MY SISTER accompanied me to my plastic surgeon appt. on Thursday where the news was not so great.  That story I will save for another day after another follow-up visit with him for some much needed confirmation!!  But...enjoyed the day and lunch with her.

AND THEN THERE'S THE HAIR...OR LACK OF!!!  Just as promised by my oncologist this was the week it began to REALLY fall out and by Friday morning in the shower it was quite dramatic and emotional for me, I'm not gonna lie.  Kenny too, for that matter.  After coming to my rescue in the shower he said it looked like a cat had died in the shower floor.  Now I looked just sick and scary, half-bald and half-haired.  I had wanted to hold off until Friday night after we picked up our sons from the airport from visiting their grandfather in NC, to somehow make the "big shave" a "fun family event".  I don't think the guys were as into that idea as their mom, which was just as well because by an hour before heading to the airport, I couldn't take it another minute...the itchiness, the soreness, the hair EVERYWHERE FALLING at the slightest touch.  Kenny and I loaded up for CVS with a cap on my head, bought some electric clippers, and headed home to do the deed.  He was feeling so bad for me, but by that time, MY overriding feeling was anxiousness to get it done.  He shaved it down as far as he could, but we still had stubble, so after trying the beard trimmer next, we even tried the razor until we decided that wasn't such a great idea...very uncomfortable to my sore head AND too much risk of infection.

I BELIEVE it was again that grace of God coming through at the moment I needed it.  I have to say...it was quite a bizarre and life-changing thing as a woman to see yourself bald for the first time in your life.  I was even BORN with hair and as women, hair is such a BIG part of our lives like it or not.  From the moment we are little girls, brushing each other's hair and wearing ribbons and barettes; and into womanhood, finding the latest style, crying over a bad haircut or color, spending hours in the mirror over the years getting it just right.  And we won't even talk about the teenage years which for me a teen of the 80's meant BIG FARRAH FAWCETTE FEATHERED HAIR!  Then to be...what seems like at first "freakishly baldheaded", sets even the strongest woman back a little when she gazes into the mirror.

THANKFULLY, I'M ALMOST OVER IT ALREADY!  I say almost because I know feelings will ebb and flow.  Feels even kind of neat at moments - like letting the nice hot shower water run down my head, then stepping out of the shower, it feels instantly cool, like your head's a big York Peppermint Patty.  I haven't gotten motivated to buy the wig yet, perhaps I will.  Perhaps I'm being rebellish in my own way.  I strapped on a pretty colorful scarf (which probably screamed "CANCER") and walked the crowded mall Saturday, and yes...I could feel the stares, especially standing in the three-hour line at Bath and Body, but just tried to ignore them.  A bandana to the airport, pink ball cap (compliments of my niece) to choir practice, and even donned a red 20's style hat on Sunday for the cantata, which itched pretty badly I must say, and bumped everyone's face when I tried to give hugs, but looked ok, I guess.

I'll just try to think of myself as tough Demi Moore in "GI Jane" everytime I look in the mirror at my round slick head.  I'm not brave enough yet to display for you our pix we took of my new style.  Maybe one day, I will be.