FREEDOM

I guess you could say FREEDOM was kind of the "theme" of church today, mainly through the songs that we sung.  It was a GREAT day and I DID feel a peaceful freedom to worship God despite all, but  also because of so many reasons!  One line of this great new song we sang said

...."I want to raise my hands a little higher than before".

This line had a profound symbolic meaning for me in some obvious ways.  Still healing from the mastectomy three weeks ago, I have a varied degree of constant pain in my chest and arms and limited mobility, which is why I look a little robotic walking around.  The surgeon strongly encouraged me to work on improving my mobility by doing exercises like walking my fingers up a wall higher, and higher, pushing through the pain, and stretching it out even if its painful.  Well, lets just say, I've never liked exercise of ANY kind before, hence the treadmill that I just had to have is now in the garage.  Why would I now in my current condition want to do something that feels so painful and totally wrong, like the surgeon's lost his mind and obviously doesn't know how much I hurt!  But, I have tried to work on it especially in the shower using the warm water to my advantage.  I know that its for my good and that if I don't, I will loose (lose? - I never know?) my range of motion and cause shoulder issues down the line.

Its an act of will and determination to do those exercises, just the same as its an act of my will to worship by raising my arms (we happen to be a pentecostal church), or singing, or whatever way you express a sacrifice that symbolizes your attention is on God for that time period.  And in the same way...the more I push through my own limitations and stretch myself spiritually, I will gain more FREEDOM!

You want to hear the neat thing?... I may have hurt before I got there and even after it was over, but while I sang and lifted or swayed my arms in my limited fashion, I was feeling no pain, or perhaps my attention was certainly not on it.  Either way...FREEDOM!